Perspire to Inspire

Everyone born on planet earth leaves behind one indelible lesson for others to learn, out of only two.

1)       A lesson which serves as an inspiration for others to follow, or

2)       A lesson which serves as a warning for others to avoid.

The pertinent question is, “Which one are we going to leave behind?”

We have but one life to live and we better live it well because if we don’t do anything with our lives now and make no effort to make it better, we may be living in regret for the rest of our lives. It would be of no use then, to complain and grumble about how messed up our lives are.

Most of us plan our meals and our recreation but fail to plan the details of our lives. This planning will only be possible if we discover our lives’ purpose. Those with a purpose in life are those who will be able to make a difference in their lives.

Some live their lives sitting down before the television and computer, living their existence through them and then blame everyone and everything else for the failures and disappointments in their lives. These are aimless people who just drift from one day to the next. They will be in for a shock one day when they find themselves at a dead end.

When one blames someone or something for what had happened to him, he is in fact proclaiming to the whole world that he himself is a loser. Yes, he has lost the control of his life to those persons or situations whom/which he cast his blame upon. He is saying that the other person or thing or situation is in control of him and his affairs. Blaming will not get us anywhere.

Having a purpose is like having a steering wheel in your car. The steering wheel steers the car and gets it going to its destination. Likewise our purposes steer our lives and get our lives going to where we want to go.

We should not just be happy with living ordinary lives. We must desire to live extraordinary lives with a purpose. How do we realize our lives’ purpose? Well, we are all endowed with skills and talents and we all have some interests and desires which we want to fulfill. Now if we would only merge our skills and talents with our interests and desires, we will be able to discover our lives’ true purpose which will enable us to live extraordinary lives with passion. Then and only then will we be able to live a life of inspiration and not a life of warning. For that to happen we must work towards it; we must perspire (ie: work for it) before we can inspire.

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Lessons I Learned

It was just gastric pain, I thought, but it became worse on a Monday night. I writhed in pain the whole night and dragged myself to school on Tuesday morning. Seeing my pale and contorted face, my concerned colleagues demanded that I go to see a doctor immediately, but I flatly refused. I was more in a dilemma than in pain as I think back. It was the busiest time of the year, right smack in the middle of the final exams.

“Who will do my work if I go back? I have to submit a number of reports. I have to mark the exam papers. I have to collate the results and prepare the final analysis. I have to complete my School Excellence Module report.” With such thoughts racing through my mind I decided to bear the severe pain and stay on in school. My colleagues had to literally evacuate me from school.

At the hospital I was kept under observation from 10am till 2,30pm and the diagnosis was ‘acute colic’. When I returned home with my husband the pain grew worse. I was throwing up even sips of water. By 5pm my condition grew worse and my husband rushed me back to the hospital. This time they admitted me saying I might have gall stones. A scan taken the following day showed something else. The doctor told me that I had obstructive Para-umbilical hernia and needed to be operated on early the next morning. He said that the part of the intestine, which was obstructed, could burst thus endangering my life. Even then, the doctor said that the operation involved a risk because of the hernia operation which was performed in my umbilical area in 2008. According to him the mesh which was placed in that area (It was secured with 8 swiches and 16 staples) had to be ripped off and that would cause some bleeding and scarring. To remove that, he said, they would have to cut me open vertically and horizontally.

My head spun upon hearing that. Numerous sms’s were made to my family, colleagues and friends in church. Everyone prayed fervently and kept enquiring about me anxiously. My family was with me all the time. Church friends sent out prayer requests and continued praying fervently. Some church friends came to my side to pray that night. My colleagues came to visit and cheer me up. I was greatly consoled and felt immense peace in my heart. I knew God was in control and that I would not need an operation. Although frightened of the unknown, I surrendered the unknown into the hands of my Lord Jesus, thanked Him for my family, colleagues and friends and dozed off. That was the first time I slept peacefully in that whole week.

The next morning my Prof entered the room with a team of doctors saying that the operation will take place at 10.00am as scheduled. Upon examining me he was surprised. (So was I) There was no pain when he pressed on the affected area. He could not feel the hardened obstruction which he had felt the previous day. He told me that the obstruction had moved from where it was lodged. Therefore, he said, that the operation was not in immediate need, but if something like hardened bowel gets lodged in there anytime I would have to be operated on without a question. Therefore I must ensure that constipation never occurs.

It was a time of jubilation for all of us. We thanked God the almighty for hearing the prayers of His people and healing me.

This was a very good learning experience for me. First I learned that I am not indispensible. When I fell sick the work which I had left behind was completed by others. Secondly I learned that by my absence a vacuum will be created in the lives of my loved ones. I learned that, that vacuum can only be filled by God. Thirdly I learned that good health is never to be exchanged for anything in this world. One cannot do anything worthwhile in the absence of good health. Next I saw the goodness in those around me and grew to love them and appreciate them even more. My family who were there all the time for me even when they had to attend to important things, my friends who prayed around the clock sacrificing even their sleep and my dear colleagues who notwithstanding all the mountain load of work they had during the most busiest time of the year, after SA2, chipped in to cover all my duties without complaining. That was the beauty I saw in each one of them and I appreciate their help in my time of need and I owe them a lot. Finally I learned that when God’s people pray in faith claiming His healing, He hears them and healing takes place without a doubt.

I thank my family, my friends and my dear colleagues for their unflinching help in my time of dire need and I thank God my Father Almighty for letting me go through this experience and teaching me important lessons which I will treasure all  my life.

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My Philosophy as an Educator

Life is a non-refundable GIFT. We either make it or break it. I believe in living my life to the best of my God given abilities by being a blessing to all those around me and with all whom I come in contact with. I believe in leaving behind a legacy for those after me when I ‘go back home’.

I did not choose this career by default. I had long wanted to follow in the footsteps of my mum and my aunts and grabbed the first opportunity, when my dad retired, to apply for teaching.  I had a sister and two brothers who were still schooling then. My parents were greatly relieved when I took the responsibility to provide for my family. I was only 19 then.

I have seen all kinds of children from 1979 till today 2010. I have grown wiser too. I used to get angry with my pupils when they failed to produce results, back then. Now instead of getting angry with them I look for the root cause. 

I believe that every single child has the capacity to learn in some way. Each child needs to feel important. Every child has to feel wanted, loved and has to have a sense of self worth or else he or she will not perform. Children do what they see 90% of the time. Therefore the child’s environment, family background, physical, health and other conditions, etc have to be taken into consideration. Given time, every child will excel, but in a different way from another child, if he/she is taught with understanding and heaps of patience. At the heart of every educator, there must be a passion to mould each child without extinguishing his/her zeal for knowledge and without taking away the child’s sense of self worth.

Do results matter? Yes and no. Yes, when it comes to comparing the school with other schools. Yes, when the child does not get into a good secondary school. Yes, when other parents boast of their children’s good results. Yes, if the child is capable but lazy. When we look around the world today, most rich and famous are not degree holders. Who then makes it in life? I firmly believe in inculcating moral values and teaching life skills to the little ones from a very early age. If that is done by every parent and every educator, we will not have to fret and the child will not have to suffer. There are so many ways for the child to make it in life.

Being positive in every situation and having a splendid vision for the future is very important. Complaining and grumbling will get us nowhere. Every successful person has succeeded in life, by having a positive vision and affirming it daily. Our thoughts and words have the power to create our future. Therefore we have to be conscious of what we think and speak. We have the ability to create a positive environment around us wherever we go. We must have specific measurable goals and act upon them without procrastinating.

Learning does not stop at JC, Poly or University. I believe that learning is life-long. Every educator has to continuously improve his / her knowledge by reading relevant books and articles. Times have changed. Every child is born with computer skills these days. We educators, have to equip ourselves with the relevant skills to teach the 21^st Century children.

Finally I do not want to miss out the important people and important times of my life. Today I am here, tomorrow I may be gone. There will surely be someone to fill my post as a teacher, but the vacuum in the lives of my husband and children will never be filled. After immersing myself in my professional duties all these years, I have come to realize that ‘health is REALLY wealth!’ Spending sufficient time with our family is imperative. Taking time to rest and rejuvenate is equally important. This will only enhance our ability to perform better.

Most importantly, I believe that one must always live, move and do everything in God’s holy presence for without Him we are nothing, and all glory and praise must be given to God our almighty Father!

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Time to take Control !

If you have read my previous article, you may be wondering if I am an extremist with regards to the television. Well I assure you that I am not.

We have seen the negative effects which most of the television programmes and advertisements have on the viewers. Now, there are good educational and motivational programmes, which do edify the viewers, but again one must exercise extreme caution and restraint while viewing them. The viewer must be aware of the secrets of consumer seduction employed by the advertisers and the programmes which lead one towards immorality and  impiety, and the programmes which cause one to waste precious time and  trade one’s health for cheap pleasure. In short the viewer must be in control.

Some useful suggestions :

1)  Never watch television when you are bored, tired, sad or angry. This will only lead to watching unnecessary and mind numbing programmes which rob you of your time, energy, health, money, success and prevent you from building a healthy relationship with your loved ones.

2)  Look up the directory and take note of the important educational and motivational programmes. Exercise caution in choosing the programmes wisely.

3)  Pre-record the programmes.

4)  Before watching the programmes let them run and delete all the advertisements.

5)  Now you are ready to watch unadulterated edifying programmes.

If watching television causes licentiousness to prevail and the negative influence caused, is sufficient to cause slow but sure death of the body, mind, and conscience of the viewers, then why, I wonder, do we allow ourselves and our loved ones to be controlled by it? I would not even wish it upon the worst criminal in prison.

If we fail to take control of our lives and let the television take control of us then we are surely but truly headed for a doomed existence.

Don’t you think it is time to take control? Why not read a good book instead?

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Have a VISION not TELE-VISION

Having a positive vision for one’s life is very important. Thoughts create our reality. If we think ‘failure’, we become failures. If we think ‘success’ we emerge as successful people. This is enforced in schools and reiterated by numerous success coaches.  But alas all their efforts are ruined by the other ‘vision’, the television! Now, you may disagree with me, but it is a fact that our future generation is fast moving down the spiral in every aspect although it ‘seems’ like they are progressing. Let us look at the following facts.

Television is hypnotic and addictive. It elevates the viewer’s emotion, reduces thinking and stifles imagination. In short it numbs the entire brain. Television gives us quick solutions for the insidious manipulation of human desires for commercial purposes. It increases consumerism and transforms its viewers into greedy, gluttonous and mindless consumers. It jeopardises health. Television camouflages reality and increases violent behaviour. It wrecks marriages. The sacred relationship between a husband and wife are turned into cheap thrills and sensual pleasures thus promoting infidelity, adultery, sexual promiscuity, indecency and immorality, and it causes its viewers to accept what is being shown as natural and commonplace.  Television not only numbs one’s mind but also kills the viewer’s conscience.

Then there is also the danger of being fixated on the negative happenings all around the world like, natural disasters, gang fights, robbery, bloodshed etc while there are so many positive things to dwell upon.  I am not saying that one should not watch news or follow the daily happenings around the globe. It is good to be well informed as that will help one to keep safe, but there is always a danger of becoming over focused on the negatives. Furthermore even during news telecasts there are advertisements, which sublimely transmit messages to our brain making us fall prey to what is being advertised.

It is so sad that well meaning parents, grandparents and baby-sitters seat their children, as early as one year, in front of  the, ‘almighty television.’ They unknowingly expose their precious children to an entire world of pure, unadulterated, ancient and modern vices from which they are working so hard to protect their children. Is it not an irony? It is not surprising that when their children display undesirable character traits they wonder where they went wrong in their upbringing.

Educators bemoan the fact that their pupils are not reading enough books and therefore are not able to write well. There is a rising need for in house councillors in every school these days. What teachers cannot do, the television does. Yes, teachers often find it an arduous task to sustain the attention of the pupils for more than 10mins but the same children sit in front of the electrical box, with glassy eyes, hooked onto the screen for endless hours.

“The picture on the TV changes every five or six seconds, either by changing the camera angle or cutting to an entirely new scene," writes Moody. "One researcher refers to these events as jolts per minute, noting that as time is cut up, the brain is conditioned to change at the expense of continuity of thought.”  

This explains why our pupils cannot sit still and concentrate on what is being taught, without being distracted.

In a July, 1996 speech, President Bill Clinton noted that, "a typical child watches 25,000 hours of television before his or her 18th birthday. Preschoolers watch 28 hours of television a week."

Thus in view of the above arguments, we can conclude that divorce, negative influences from the media, and materialism promoted by the media especially television are the three greatest threats to families in their communities.

We cannot have the cake and eat it at the same time. Likewise we cannot have a vision in our minds and continue to watch television. That vision in our mind will vanish into oblivion.

Wise is the person who refuses to fall into the television’s perilous trap, for he will be happy, healthy, prosperous and successful.

I have included a poem about the dangers of television. Please read and reflect.

God bless

Mrs Mary Augustine

I came across this interesting poem on a website. Just thought of sharing with you. Here it is....

THE 23^RD CHANNEL (instead of the 23^rd Psalm)

The TV is their shepherd, They shall want.

It makes them lie down on the sofa.

It leads them away from the Scriptures.

It destroys their souls.

It leads them in the path of sex and violence,

for the sponsor’s sake.

Yea, though they walk in the shadow of their

Christian responsibilities,

there will be no interruption,

For the TV is with them.

It’s cable and remote, they control them.

It prepares a commercial before them in

the presence of worldliness;

It anoints their heads with Humanism,

Their coveting runneth over.

Surely laziness and ignorance shall

Follow them all days of their lives:

And they shall dwell in their homes

Watching TV forever.

********http://www.amishnews.com/23channel.html********

A Friendly Word of Caution

Of all the modern inventions, it looks like the usage of earphones and headphones fall second in place to the cell-phones. You can practically see everyone young and old sitting, standing, walking, jogging, exercising, travelling, working and even sleeping with the earphones plugged into their ears.

It is a marvellous device which allows you to hear what you want to hear, without disturbing others and allows you to hear anything without embarrassing yourself. Albeit it is so useful, letting noise level above 80decibels into your ear can potentially cause damage to the structures in the middle and inner ear, and to the nerve pathways related to the perception of sound. For your information, an IPOD Nano can play at 110decibels. Furthermore you will not be able to hear the surrounding noise well and can miss out on a surrounding danger which might cost you, your precious life and your family’s peace and joy..

Through a recent research scientists have discovered that even common noise, such as highly amplified music and gas-engine mowers or leaf blowers, can damage human hearing with prolonged exposure.

This is so disturbing because this means that our children and youth are in danger of losing their hearing, which is irreparable, by the age of 25 or 30. Moreover there is also the danger of not being able to hear God’s voice because God speaks in the silence of our hearts. When there is constant noise drumming into our ears our brain becomes numb and our thoughts get disrupted.

Although I agree that earphones are useful and are required to be worn in some instances, they must be used in moderation and with caution.

You may want to read further, about ‘Noise and Hearing Loss,’ and ‘the decibels considered potentially hazardous to human ears,’ in the following link:

http://www.asha.org/public/hearing/disorders/noise.htm

What’s it with Face-book?

Just a while ago I overheard my youngest son talk to his friend on the phone. This is how the conversation went…

“Hey! I just deleted 148 people from my face-book. Ya, these are people I don’t know. By the way, I think we should delete the face-book, all together. I think it is a waste of time….. (his friend talks – I can’t hear his side of the conversation)….. but seriously, why do we need the face-book? We keep staring at the computer nearly the whole day and read about what is happening in other people’s lives….(his friend talks)….I would rather look at my own life and try to improve it. Who needs to know what the other person is doing and half the time we only read the rubbish posted there.”

“Praise the Lord! He has been enlightened by the Holy Spirit!” I exclaimed within myself.

These days, both old and young are caught in the web of the face-book. I agree that it is useful to keep in touch with friends and to make new friends but little do most people realize that it eats into their precious time. Yes I do agree with my son that it is a waste of time in most instances.

Wait! Before you throw stones at me please read further.  Face-book is for those above eighteen years of age. Nevertheless young school going children and teens below eighteen, enter their ages as above eighteen and sign up for an account in the face-book. Then they, thrilled at the realization that they can communicate with many friends and make many more friends, spend most of their waking time and sleeping time chatting on it. They neglect their studies and as a result their grades drop drastically.

Most of these kids lack maturity and just post any comment or picture on it, without realizing the consequences of their actions.  Recently one such comment by a teenager caused a family feud. Another time because of a comment posted by a prankster, a gang fight broke out. Young people these days use it to poke fun at one another. They even post negative or embarrassing comments about someone they don’t like or about someone they are angry with and others will add on to these comments.

Face-book can be put to good use if one has self control. It is a fantastic tool to inform one’s friends of something one would like to share. You can get connected to long lost friends through the face-book and you can save on sms’s and phone calls. You can even keep track of what your children are up to. (Ooops! The cat is out of the bag!) Nevertheless you should learn the art of being the master of the face-book and not its slave.

Always  remember, a knife can be used to cut an apple and it can also kill someone; fire can be used to cook your meals and can also destroy things and lives; medicine heals when the proper dosage is taken and the same medicine can kill when there is an over dosage administered. Likewise, face-book can help you to save time or to waste time. Face-book can bring people together or apart depending upon the way you use it.

Therefore my dear face-book people out there, keep in mind that lost time and lost age can never be gotten again. Not even in your dreams. So use the face-book wisely.

The ‘Magic in Your Life’

Ha, ha! My cool teenagers, you will be jubilating over the fact that finally, you have found one soul who understood you fully. You are right. I am on your side and because I care for you, I am posting one more article to help you become wise. Now go ahead, read on . . .

Yes teenagers nowadays are a misunderstood group of people who are unjustly accused of being rebellious… but are they incapable of thinking and acting and making a choice for themselves? Certainly not! They are just as capable, or even more capable than anyone of us. Then why on earth are they making bad choices?

Teens these days go through numerous struggles in life. They have to struggle to fight for their rights; struggle to make their needs known; struggle to keep up with the fast paced life around them; struggle to be in touch with the latest and coolest hip hop fashion; struggle to be recognized. Through all these struggles, one would expect them to emerge stronger and wiser.

Like I said earlier, most teens grow up with wrong role models or in front of the television set. But if they learn wrong things from the wrong sources they should be able to learn the right things from the right sources given the fact that they have gone through intensive and extensive training in struggling with the known and the unknown.

There are only two options for everyone in life. The first option is to learn, benefit and grow from the experiences of others and the second option is to learn from one’s own struggles, mistakes and hardships. Unfortunately most choose the second option to their own chagrin in their matured years.

What is preventing them from learning the right things or making the right choices? I believe it is their determination to make it on their own. They tend to reject all advice given or lessons taught by others who have struggled through similar situations. They want to be independent. They want to emerge as winners in their own eyes without anyone’s help. They want to ‘do it their own way’. Although that is an admirable quality, they will do well by heeding the advice of their elders. This will help them save time. Otherwise they will be spending their entire existence, trying to put their lives together.

Then regrets and remorse will ensue. Those who are strong, those who can control their emotions and those who can pick themselves up from where they are, will manage to make something out of their remaining years, months or days. These will emerge as successful leaders who live to tell the world their success stories. The rest will sadly wilt away. They will live the remaining period of their lives in regrets, hurts and accusations or give up on life like Humpty Dumpty.

Once again, I recall my late mother’s wise words here, “Wise is the child, who heeds the advice of those who have tread the path before him/her. Innumerable treasures await at his/her gate.”

I have only three things to say to all you teenagers who are reading this, “Be alert at all times. Choose wisely. Pray much.” This way of living will then create the ‘Magic in your Life’ and will prevent you from living a life full of misery and regrets.

God bless.   

Standing in the Gap

When I was a teenager, I used to wonder why my parents never understood me! Then when my children were teens I used to wonder why my teens don’t understand me! Ever felt the same? Come on, give me a high five! Well it is not easy to be a parent, especially the parent of teens. Parents with two year old kids, if you think you are undergoing difficult times with your children, wait till they reach their teens. Brace yourselves for the impending horrors.

Having one teen can give us a heart attack but having three (when my three lovely sons were teens) can give us massive heart attacks, if we are not careful. How careful can we be? Well read on to find out what we should do to prevent heart attacks or massive heart attacks.

Let’s see what happens to our darlings when they transform into teenagers. Firstly all teenagers experience hormonal changes. This makes them feel, that we parents are sadists. To them we are killers of all joy. This is not their fault, blame it on the hormones. Every teenager, boy or girl will go through this phase.

In order to help them develop into holistic adults, we have to squeeze our feet into their shoes, to feel as they would feel and we have to put on their lens to see the world as they would see them. If we have not been good role-models, we must admit our mistakes and honestly tell them that we are sorry for not being good role models. This is the only way to gain their respect. This is the first step towards filling in the gap between them and ourselves. When they see that we are humble and sincere in wanting the best for them they will respond accordingly.

Secondly we must spend time to get to know them. Go on a date with them. Give them ample time to speak their hearts out. Listen to them without being judgemental. Sometimes they will just want to pour their hearts out. They may not want you to advice them. Look for the right time and opportunity to advise them on certain issues. You will only be able to do that if you build a strong bonding with them. Tell them about your experiences as a teenager. I am sure they would love to hear about it. Don’t freak out if they appear before you with ‘Frankenstein’s’ hairstyle. Make them feel loved. Guide them gently with your unconditional love. Get to know their friends, but never ever criticise them. If you think their friends may lead them astray talk to your child privately about you fears but not when you are on a date with them because they may associate the dating time with advice hearing time and they will eventually refuse to go on a date with you.

Finally, we need to stand in the gap with unceasing prayer, constant affirmation, lots of unconditional love, compassion, unconditional forgiveness and tons of patience. This will do the impossible. But it will take time. Let me stress here that standing in the gap in prayer is of utmost importance. In Ezekiel 33:6-7 The Lord commands us to hear from Him and speak to our children. Thus we must always be on constant watch and in unceasing prayer (communication) with God our Father in order to be able to lead our children in the footsteps of Christ.

We may struggle to understand our teens and our teens may struggle to understand us but take heart, this phase will soon pass. When we surrender them to the loving arms of our Creator and constantly pray for them we can be assured that they are in the safest hands ever. Meanwhile let us just continue to love them and be there for them.

Be Blessed
Mary Augustine

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Sow in Tears & Reap with Joy

Have you ever wondered why your child who was so obedient yesterday begins to want his/her own way today? Have you ever wondered how on earth your child got those horns growing on his/her head? If so you may need to re-view your parenting strategies.

We most often pass the responsibility of child rearing to others and blame each other. We expect our spouse and the teachers in school to inculcate all the values in our children while we sit back and relax. We make the grievous mistake of being wrong role models to our children or leaving them with wrong role models (TV included) when they are younger and then we begin to set rules when or children reach teen-age. This late inception of rules, has often proven to be futile and there is a risk of it backfiring on us.

We need to train our children when they are young. My late mother used to tell us, “Suffer now enjoy later. Enjoy now suffer later.” It is entirely up to us to choose an option. We can either role model the right behaviour, discipline our children early and relax later or relax now and work extremely hard at disciplining our children later (in other words suffer later).

Children who were not disciplined at an early stage and children who had wrong role-models will feel like natives on an isolated island surrounded by a dense forest with a complicated map in their hands. The directions on the map will seem alien and incomprehensible to them. All they know is how to manoeuvre through the dense foliage by the examples shown by their fathers and forefathers. Likewise when all of a sudden a set of rules is thrust upon them, they will freak out. They won’t understand why they can’t do this or that or say this or that, when that was how they were taught to do and say things. They begin to feel lost and become even more confused. They then begin to disobey and eventually rebel. Therefore it is pointless to blame them.

We as parents must exercise caution and employ wisdom in child rearing. Children brought up in this manner will turn out to be mature and successful adults. It is written in the bible in Proverbs 22:6.”Train a child in the way he should go, and even when he is old he will not turn away from it.” We must remember that a child emulates 90% of what he/she sees. Let us therefore sow early in tears and reap a rich harvest with joy.

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In Awe of Today’s Teens

What are the challenges that face teens these days?

1)  Peer Pressure

2)  Morality Issues

3)  Affluence and Entertainment

The media and the world around us are flooded with advertisements, coated with sugary promises, that the things advertised will make us more beautiful, smart, attractive, successful or powerful. They make those who do not own the things which are advertised, feel inadequate, miserable and powerless. This pressurizes one into succumbing to the temptation of buying and hoarding when there is no real need. The insatiable desire to own all the 5 C’s namely, car, cash, credit card, condominium and membership’s to country clubs, is the present evil which disillusions many.

Moral values are fast changing. What was unthinkable in those days is considered normal today. Integrity has taken on a different meaning. It means different things to different people in different circumstances. There seems to be no clear demarcation between morality and immorality. The dividing line has blurred into oblivion.

Peer pressure these days is very great. Teen-age is the age where friends become more important than parents. Getting into the good books of friends, dressing alike, owning the same type of gadgets or better ones is deemed cool.

Now despite facing all the above mentioned challenges there are many teens, who, take each challenge as a learning experience and stay afloat. I marvel at their skills and am awed by their determination to succeed without trading their consciences and values. I salute every teen, who, finally emerges as a successful leader with values.

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Me! A Teen in this era!

Sometime ago I interviewed a group of teens and posed this question to them:

“What makes one vulnerable?”

They came up with the following answers:

1) Being in situations where I'm not comfortable, most of the time it's just the great unknown that scares me.

2) Having no alternatives for action.

3) Opening up my feelings to someone,
   scares me.

4) Some situations in the past have made me feel that way.

5) Loneliness and boredom.

6) When I'm feeling worthless, when I feel lonely and when people
   are bombarding me with heaps of bloody questions all at once.

Their answers saddened me. I saw innocent children in need of love, warmth, affection and acceptance. My heart just felt a surge of compassion and I wanted to hold them in my arms all at once.

Teens these days, are living in a much more hostile and challenging environment than us in the 50’s 60’s and 70’s era. In the 50’s and 60’s in Singapore, we did not have hand-phones. Most homes did not even have televisions or telephones. We had to rely on telegrams and letters to send messages. We used to congregate at the CC’s to catch an interesting programme. Everyone, Chinese, Indians, Malays and Eurasians will sit together and enjoy a Chinese ‘Wayang’ or a Malay drama or a Tamil variety show. There was community living and sharing. There was no internet. Thus we grew up in a safe haven unscathed by the influences of the so called ‘Western World’.

Children these days are exposed to the whole world even in the seclusion of their individual homes. An altogether different concept of living tantalizes their minds. They have to go through immense struggles both mentally and emotionally to sieve through the present attractions and the demands made on them, to make the right choices in life.

Most teens seldom come through the challenges unscathed. But those who come through stand up as successful leaders who are able to counsel, lead and deliver those who are in similar predicaments.

If I was a teen now I don’t know how I would be and I certainly do not want to be a teen in this era.

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May You Be Blessed | May You Be Blessed Movie

May You Be Blessed May You Be Blessed Movie

Is going to work, hazardous to your health?

Someone told me the other day, that going to work was killing her. Although she was in a viable position in a well known company, she was falling apart from the strain of trying to cope with the demands of her job. Out of exasperation she told me, "Mary, going to work is hazardous to my health. It is killing me slowly!"

This prompted me to ponder if going to work can be hazardous to one's health. Yes my friends, it can be hazardous to your health, especially if you work in an organisation that places more value on its productivity and the management of information, than it does on it's staff.

How will work be hazardous?

1) Well, to meet the expectations of the 'Management ',  the employees will compete with one another by putting in longer hours to increase production. Some will even be forced to put in or even coerced into putting in longer hours.

2) Some will manipulate their colleagues for their own benefit.

3) Some may even carry tales about their colleagues in order to be esteemed highly by their employers.

4) Some will even have to eat their meals at improper times or not eat at all. Thus becoming critical, complaining and eventually ending up with gastric ulcers and a negative working environment. 

In this mad race to increase production and to climb the ladder, jealousy, dissension, strife, anger and hatred among colleagues will ensue. All these feelings will cause undue stress, high blood pressure, heart attack or stroke and ulcers will erupt. The staff will turn out to be complainers and critics of the management.

Now do you get the big picture? Going to work in the above situation is definitely hazardous to your health.

On the other hand if the organisation you are working in, places more emphasis on the climate of the working environment and shows a keen interest in the personhood of each employee, then everyone will feel like family rather than a subordinate. Those working in this kind of environment will be self motivated, passionate about what they do and will co-operate with each other. Then truly work will be blissful rather than a hazard.

Not everyone is as fortunate as me. I am blessed to be working in a school where the school leaders and KP's care for each individual and the welfare of the whole person. Every programme is specially created and organised for the individual needs of the pupils and staff. Every need is looked into, mental, emotional and physical. All staff, be they teachers, admin staff or OSO's are treated fairly and with love and compassion. The staff in my school care and share with one another just like family members do. This then filled my heart with grattitude.

I want everyone to be blessed as I am. You too can be happy and enjoy your work, if you start with yourself.  You can begin by creating the safe atmosphere for others who work with you and around you, instead of expecting the organisation to create a safe environment for you. Be a giver, not a taker. Give! Give of yourself until it hurts. That is real giving. Only then will you receive a great measure shaken together and pressed down to overflowing. That is a promise of God to us in the bible. Ask, "What can I do to help others, how can I create a peaceful and plesant atmosphere," instead of asking, "What is the organisation going to do to make the working environment friendly and condusive for me?".

Remember the organisation is made up of people like you and me. We are the hands and legs, eyes, ears and mouth of the organisation. What we do and say will greatly impact the organisation we work in. We have to stop being reactive and begin to be more proactive. Thus we will be able to create a positive and caring working environment.

When this becomes a reality and you are asked, "Is going to work hazardous to your health?" You can safely reply, "Definitely, not, because I create the atmosphere I want, around me".

So, my dear friends, I wish you a very happy working life. God bless.

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