I was reading Luke 18:9-14 the other day and I asked myself this question, "How do I see myself and how do I see others?"
Luke 18:9-14 (NASB) says this:-
And He (Jesus) also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt: [10] "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. [11] The Pharisee stood and was praying this to himself: 'God, I thank You that I am not like other people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. [12] I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.' [13] But the tax collector, standing some distance away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, the sinner!' [14] I tell you, this man went to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."
Here we see a Pharisee, who is a faithful practitioner of the 'Laws', standing before God in prayer. We see him attesting to God that he did not rob anyone; did not do any evil in God's sight; did not commit adultery (that means he was faithful to his spouse and to God, which was a great thing in those days, because most men were known to have many adulterous relationships), did not even collect taxes like the tax collector who was then in front of him.
This Pharisee seems like, truly a good man doesn't he? After all, over and above living a good, worthy life in accordance to the 'Laws', he started his prayer by thanking God first. Doesn't the entire Old Testament speak about the 'Sacrifice of Thanksgiving'? Here is just a sample from
Psalm 116:17 (NASB)
To You I shall offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving, And call upon the name of the LORD.
Giving thanks to God was and is still, first and foremost the best sacrificial offering to God and this Pharisee did just that, or did he?
Jesus said that he was not justified before God as the tax collector was. Why? What did the Pharisee miss out?
A Sacrifice of Thanksgiving means, being able to thank God in the midst of chaotic and stormy situations. Being able to thank God, trusting that God will make all situations calm and quieten down. It is not just to thank God during good times only. We must thank God both in good and in bad times.
Here, the Pharisee did thank God but was actually boasting of his accomplishments, was boasting about his ability to follow the laws.
Look at the tax collector, he beat his chest and cried for mercy before God, admitting that he was a sinner.
What was the difference between them both?
The Pharisee knew he adhered to all the laws of God. He compared himself with others who broke the laws. He felt good, high and mighty above them all. This made him look down on the rest of the 'sinnners'! His prayer became a thankful boasting of his own merits instead of a humble acknowledgement of God's power working in and through him.
The tax collector on the other hand admitted that he was a sinner before God. He could not even look up because of his guilt. Yet he bravely came and stood before God pleading for mercy in humility, instead of hiding away, in guilt induced depression.
Psalm 51:17 says "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and a contrite heart, O God, Thou wilt not despise."
God looks at our hearts; the motives of each one of our hearts are examined by Him. He hates a boastful heart and spirit.
Proverbs 6:16-19 (NASB) says that,
"There are six things which the LORD hates, Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him: [17] Haughty eyes, a lying tongue, And hands that shed innocent blood, [18] A heart that devises wicked plans, Feet that run rapidly to evil, [19] A false witness who utters lies, And one who spreads strife among brothers."
The first in the list which God hates is haughty(proud) eyes.
Proverbs 16:5 (NASB) says,
"Everyone who is proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD; Assuredly, he will not be unpunished."
Here from the above verses from God's Word, we see that God truly hates the proud.
No matter how good and pious one is, we will never meet God's 'Gold' standard. The very moment we think we are good, holy, pious etc we are immediately and automatically raised on a pedestal in our own eyes (not in the eyes of others). We immediately begin to look at others from our perspective, which is, below us.
By measuring ourselves against others, we are proclaiming that we are better than them, holier than them. In short, we are saying that we are saints and they are sinners!
Our biggest enemy is 'Self'! We want to look good and feel good at all times, even when we stand before God in prayer. So the first thing that comes to our mind is, "I am not so sinful as that person! There are people worse off than me! I am better than them all!"
Of course there are people better in virtue or worse off in virtue than us. But when we stand praying before God, instead of measuring ourselves against human standards, we must look at the holy and righteous God and acknowledge our unworthiness before Him.
The observation we did in this parable was before the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Jesus has paid the penalty for all of our sins. Therefore now, we need only confess our sins and acknowledge our unworthiness before the Father and believe in the saving power of the death and resurrection of Jesus and we will be justified by our faith in Christ through God's grace. Then God will hear the prayer of a 'righteous' man. We are made righteous by the blood of Christ Jesus.
Let me now go back to tell you what happened when I read the verse in Luke. God brought back to my mind the vision He showed me 6 years ago. It came back to mind crystal clear as if I was just seeing it now.
This is the vision:-
A group of five or six people, all clothed in white, flowing garments were kneeling with both their hands raised up and their heads raised high. They were praising God harmoniously. I noticed that one of them was not in a white garment. In fact that person was totally black, charcoal black, looked like an alien without facial features and was not clothed. The body was in the shape of a human but without form. Just total black. Charred, I would say. Covered in total darkness. Even that figure was praising God from a kneeling position, with hands raised up and head lifted high. I was curious. I asked the Lord, who or what that was. His answer not only shocked me but it shook me up! He said, "That is you!"
"Me!" I gasped!
"Yes, it is you before you made Me your Saviour. You were then not clothed with my righteousness. Without the cloak of My righteousness, everyone looks the same to Me. The garments you see covering everyone here is My righteousness. Without My righteous covering all will look like that, charred and deformed, covered in darkness," said He. That's when I remembered this verse in Romans 3:23 'for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God'. Yes only the blood covering of Christ Jesus makes us white as snow.
After bringing this vision back to my mind, Father God asked me, "So all have sinned and fall short of My glory. When they seek My forgiveness and My mercy, how do I see them?"
"Covered by the blood of Christ Jesus," I said.
"Yes, but how do I see them?" He asked me again.
Then it dawned upon me! "Forgiven! You see them as 'Forgiven'. Totally clean and sinless and spotless," I said.
"Then why do you see him as the same person he was, before he was washed by the blood of my Son? Why do you look down on him?" Asked Father God gently.
That question pierced my heart! I realised I was seeing my brother as someone who might never change. That is why, when he called me that evening, I spoke to him coldly and curtly and ended my conversation with him quickly.
I had been praying for my brother to change his habits but he never seemed to. He was trying, he said. He went to church weekly but was unable to give up some of the habits which were causing him to fall sick. He was struggling with his physical ailments which were partly brought about by his habits. I was sad and angry with him, but at the same time had been praying for his complete transformation.
Getting in and out of the hospital every other week has been so normal to him. The hospital has become his second home. I wanted him to be healed and healthy and wanted him to be a role model for his children. All my advice seemed to fall on deaf ears. So I began to view him as incorrigible, although I kept praying daily for him. I began to form a disgust for his way of living and I realised that my heart had become calloused. That's why I ended the call quickly.
Once the Lord convicted me of the callousness of my heart, I repented immediately and called my brother, spoke to him lovingly and told him I am praying for his transformation.
I realised that by looking at my brother as 'Guilty':-
1. I allowed pride to enter my heart.
2. I placed myself on a pedestal.
3. I looked down on him.
4. I was judging my brother, not knowing his inner struggles and his conversation with God.
5. I undermined God's ability to change him.
6. I undermined God's ability to forgive him and that God saw him as forgiven and spotless.
7. I undermined the power of the blood of Christ.
When God forgives someone a million times and sees him as 'Forgiven' & 'Spotless', who am I to see him as guilty. That means I become ten or more times worse than him because of the pride in my heart. There is no difference between me and the Pharisee in the parable.
By my behavior towards my brother I had proved to be exactly like the Pharisee, haughty and proud. I had a high and mighty opinion about myself. I was like the 'some people' Jesus told the parable to. I was like them who trusted in themselves and thought that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt.
Pride is an abomination in God's eyes. I who am a sinner need more of God's mercy and grace, to help me look at others with His eyes. To constantly look at others as 'Forgiven'!
Prayer :-
Father give me a heart
That loves as You do!
Give me eyes,
To see everyone,
Just as You see them,
Clothed with Your righteousness!
To see everyone,
Free from sin and shame!
To see everyone,
Constantly as 'Forgiven'!
Forgive me Father, cause
I am the 'Guilty' one
Who crucified Your Son
By being Haughty!
Wash me clean
With the blood of Your Son.
Never let my heart grow
calloused or cold.
Let my faults ever be
Before my eyes!
I truly am sorry
For hurting You Daddy!
Rend my heart
For what rends Yours!
Help me become more like Jesus
In thought, word & deed.
Help me be
Sincerely Humble
Tenderly Compassionate &
Love everyone unconditionally.
This I ask in Jesus name. Amen.
Mary Augustine
28/04/18