It is so sad to see how people hurt someone in anger, without realising that they are belittling them in front of others. How anger blinds their eyes. How anger transforms loving, kind people into people without feelings, that they hurl all sorts of hurtful, hateful, demeaning, derogatory words at someone and then still feel justified.
What is it that makes her/him to act this way? Well I think it is the deep rooted hurt in her/him. Something that is deeply rooted in her/his memory. Something that has wounded her/him so deeply. It also could be her/his upbringing and the words she/he has heard others use while reprimanding others.
So everytime a similar incident occurs or everytime a similar topic is spoken, it triggers her/his memory and all hell breaks loose. It could also be our own faults which causes that person to be angry.
Therefore in order to avoid such conflicts we must never bring up such topics before that person, if we know what triggers her/him. If it had been our fault, we must immediately ask for forgiveness and try never to hurt her/him again.
Secondly, we must never get angry with that person, although it is a natural human tendency to get hurt or feel insulted or feel misunderstood by her/him. Although we may feel that way, we must be in control of our feelings and pray during such moments.
Only the Holy Spirit can breathe new life into us and that person to heal all hurts, memories and all inner wounds. Surrender to God. We must first ask forgiveness from God and repent for our faults. Then forgive that person wholeheartedly for hurting us and then pray for deep inner healing for that person and for ourselves. God works miracles in Jesus' name. Trust Him.
Mary Augustine
